The Promotion

I can't believe it
I'm so humbled
(Now I get just what I want)
Is this thing on?
I mustn't mumble
(All along I was the one)
Ensure the empire doesn't crumble
(Finally, they're really gone)
I never thought I'd see this moment
(To this I'm holding on)

Who'd have thought I'd ever stand here
(Take a picture to preserve)
Bathing in the warmth of your cheers
(It is me you're gonna serve)
Holding back the very real tears
(Yes, I've got a bloody nerve)
I'm feeling all these mixed emotions
(I'll kick you to the kerb)

Sad to see you go
(I won't be)
The greatest we have ever, ever known
(Yes, that's me)
The fuss you're making
Well, there's no mistaking how much you all adore me
(Well, so you should)

So hard to believe
(Not really)
You would put all of your trust and faith in me
(It's lunacy)
I'm just some guy
I think I'm really gonna cry
Out of everyone, you chose me
(It was meant to be)

Please, no more congratulations
(Unsuspecting minions)
Let's go get 'em
Back to your stations
(Now I want my billions)
Move along
I'm getting impatient now